In Heaven
by montypython203
Summary: Post Doomsday. Rose meets up with some old faces, as well as some new ones.
1. Chapter 1

_Title: In Heaven  
_

_Rating: K+ (may change later)_

_Summary: Rose meets up with some old faces._

_Setting: About 3 months after Doomsday._

_Disclaimer: Oh Doctor, you're so fine, you're so fine but you're not mine hey Doctor, hey, hey, hey Doctor!  
_

Rose clutched her chest and fell to her knees. A single tear ran down her face as she realised what was happening. She tried to scream, but no sound came out. She saw her life flashing before her eyes. Her first day at school. Her first kiss. Meeting the Doctor. Parting with the Doctor. And now she was remembering her last moments. It was 2 a.m., and she'd just finished the nightshift at Torchwood. She'd been walking home, when she'd passed a dark alleyway. Suddenly, she heard gunshots, and they were close. She turned her head, to see a tall man standing over the dead body of another man. The tall man was holding a gun.

"Oh my god," Rose whispered. Before she could do anything, the man had raised the gun and fired at her, before running off into the night.

So now Rose lay here, helpless. She felt herself fading away. Slowly, she closed her eyes. And then she was gone.

- - - - - - - - - - - - - -

_I know, you're all thinking "How could you kill Rose off?!" but her story continues. Think about what just happened. Then think about the title. Then think about the summary. You connect the dots._


	2. Chapter 2

_Here's chapter 2. This chapter contains all my own ideas about heaven. As I'm sure you know, no one knows for sure what it's like. A big thank you to Scout Girl and Sarah for your reviews. _

Rose opened her eyes and tried to make sense of what had happened.

"I was, now I'm, oh my god," said Rose. It was only now that she sat up and had a look around. The clouds, the singing, the smell of flowers, it all pointed to one thing.

"I'm … dead," Rose whispered. She took a moment to register this. She had always considered her farewell to the Doctor as an emotional death, but now she was physically dead. Just then a piece of paper fell to her from the sky. She picked it up and read it.

_Welcome to Heaven! _it read. _For all proper introductions and information, simply think of the environment you're most comfortable in and declare "I'm ready!". _

"Right," said Rose. She smiled to herself as she thought of her room in the TARDIS. She then took a deep breath.

"I'm ready!" she exclaimed. At first she thought nothing had happened, but as she looked around she realised she was now in fact in her room. And sitting on her bed was a young man with golden hair.

"Hello Rose," he said. "My name is Nathaniel. I'm here to make sure know everything that's going on." Rose nodded, her mouth open slightly.

"I know, it must be a shock," Nathaniel said.

"Well, yeah," said Rose. "It's just, I've seen the end of the Earth. I've faced Daleks, Cybermen, Slitheen. Then after less than a year in the parallel universe it all ended in a dark alley at night. It's so cliché." Nathaniel laughed.

"Good on you Rose," he said. "Not many people take their death so easily. But of course, this is the second time you've died, isn't it?"

"Yes," said Rose. "Which reminds me, if there are parallel universes are their parallel heavens?"

"I'm afraid I can't answer that," Nathaniel replied. "The universe, or universes for that matter, work in mysterious ways. But this is the Heaven of the universe you were born in, the one you belong to."

"I understand," Rose said. "So, why did I have to think of an environment I'm comfortable in?"

"Well, that environment is now your room," Nathaniel explained. "You can change it at any time, of course. And you can add accessories of any sort."

"I thought God was against material possessions," Rose said.

"Er, it depends," said Nathaniel. "And I don't want to go into all that right now."

"Okay," said Rose. "So how do people spend their time here?"

"Any way they want, as long as it doesn't involve sinning," Nathaniel said. "Which reminds me, try not to us the Lord's name in vain too often."

"Oh, sorry," said Rose, remembering what she said earlier.

"It's okay, it's a habit, he'll understand," Nathaniel said. "Getting back on topic, you control the environment for yourself. If you want it to be day, it's day. But for those people who want it to be night, it's night for them. You won't need to sleep, unless you want to. Some people like sleeping."

"Right," said Rose. "How do I see other people?"

"You use the directory," answered Nathaniel. "Simply think of the person, picture them in your mind. Then their location will appear to you. You can transport yourself to them any way you wish. Immediate teleport, flying, just plain old walking, you'll get there eventually. If they're in their room you'll appear outside their door. Oh, and speaking of doors, outside your door, or any room's door for that matter, is the main hall. A good place to socialise, watch the sport, but not everyone will be going for the same team remember, and there's a list posted of all the people that have died in the past 24 hours. It's updated roughly every 5 minutes."

"Okay," Rose said. "Well, I think that's all I need to know for now."

"Great," said Nathaniel, standing up. "Whenever you're ready, come out and meet some people. It'll all sound like English to you, just like with the TARDIS. And if you want anything, just wish for it!" Before Rose could say anything, Nathaniel had vanished.

"Wow," she said. "Okay, I want … chips!" A bucket of Rose's favourite chips appeared in her hand.

"Neat," she said. "Now I can eat all the chips I want!"

- - - - - - - - - - - - - -

After eating her chips, Rose went outside. The main hall was very crowded, but somehow no one got in each other's way. Suddenly an old lady approached Rose. Rose recognised her from somewhere, but she couldn't think where.

"Hello dear," she said. "Oh, you poor thing, dying young."

"Thank you," said Rose. "You seemed to do all right for yourself."

"Yes, 86," the woman said proudly. "And considering the life expectancy in the 1860s wasn't very high, it was quite an achievement."

"Yes indeed," agreed Rose. "Wait a minute. 1860s? Um, did you die in 1869?"

"Yes," confirmed the woman. "Mind you, there was a bit of a problem. My body was possessed by …"

"The Gelth," finished Rose. "Um, I was there. I helped to close the rift." The woman opened her mouth.

"Oh yes, I thought I knew you from somewhere," she said. "I was watching what was happening. You're … Rose Tyler!"

"Indeed I am," said Rose. The woman smiled and gave Rose a hug.

"Oh, you were so brave," she said. "Say, have you met my grandson? He's just a little older than you. He's quite a dashing young lad." Rose laughed.

"I don't think I'm ready for that sort of thing yet," Rose said. "But I'd be happy to make a new friend."

"Great!" the woman said. "Or as that friend of yours said, fantastic! Well, I'd love to arrange something. I've got my knitting group on now, but I'll talk to my grandson and I'll contact you."

"Sounds good to me," Rose said. "Oh, I didn't catch your name."

"Alathea," the woman said. "And my grandson's James."

"Well, nice to meet you Alathea," Rose said. "Now, is there a library around here?"

"You can just wish for a book if you want it," Alathea said. "But if you aren't looking for a particular book, there's a sign over there that says LIBRARY. Just touch it and you'll be there."

"Thank you," Rose said. She made her way through the crowd of people. She realised that they each passed through one another. But she'd hugged Alathea before …

_You must just touch people if you want to touch them_, she realised. Rose reached the sign and touched it.

- - - - - - - - - - - - - -

_I don't recall the old woman and her grandson having names, but if they did, sorry. I named the woman after my grandma and the guy after my brother. Anyway, I'll update when I can. In the meantime, review!_


	3. Chapter 3

_Thank you to everyone who's reviewed so far! And if there's anyone you want Rose to meet, just tell me and I'll see what I can do._

The library was everything you could want in a library. It had nice comfy couches, a warm fire burning, and in the background you could hear classical music. Then Rose noticed some people nodding their heads like they were listening to rock music.

_Okay, that's what they want in a library, _she thought. She picked a shelf at random and started browsing. She noticed a series of _X Files _books. She'd never watched the show, but maybe after having her own experiences with aliens it'd be more interesting. She picked a book and lay down on a couch.

- - - - - - - - - - - - -

Rose didn't know how long she'd been reading for. It was so great how time wasn't a factor here. She was sure she could increase the speed of her reading if she wanted, but right now she was just enjoying the tranquillity.

"Rose?" said a voice behind her. Rose was a little startled. She turned around, and her eyes widened. Standing there was her dad, her real dad.

"Dad!" she exclaimed.

"Shh!" said a middle-aged man who was sitting near them.

"Um, should we go to my room?" Rose asked.

"Sure," Pete said. Immediately they were transported to Rose's room.

"Ha, why am I not surprised?" Pete said, looking around Rose's room. Rose smiled and wrapped her arms around her father.

"I've missed you so much," she said.

"I don't know, you've had a parallel me," Pete said.

"Yeah, making it even more painful," Rose said. "It was you, but it wasn't. I know he tried to love me like a daughter, but it just wasn't the same." Pete nodded.

"Oh Rose, I can't believe you died," he said. "When I saw your name there I was just heartbroken. You were always so full of life, especially when you were travelling with the Doctor."

"Yeah, well, I haven't done that in a while," Rose said, lowering her head a bit.

"You know, on that day I met you, I knew there was something special between you and the Doctor," Pete said.

"Yeah, you thought he was my boyfriend," Rose said.

"No, I mean the way didn't want you to get hurt," Pete said. "He did everything he could to keep me alive, so you'd be happy. And I've seen the things he's done for you, and the way he looked at you. He didn't need to say those words at Bad Wolf Bay." Tears came to Rose's eyes.

"I know," she whispered. "It just would have been a nice way to leave it. Then again, would it have been more painful?" Pete hugged his daughter.

"You listen to me," he said. "That man loved you with all his heart."

"Hearts," murmured Rose.

"Er, right," said Pete. "You were very lucky to have something like that, even if it didn't go anywhere. Sarah Jane was right."

"True," said Rose. "Say, how much of my life did you see?"

"As much as I could," Pete replied.

"No, I mean, was it like …" Rose struggled to find the right words, " … censored?"

"Ah," Pete said. "There are restrictions, yes." Rose blew out a breath of relief.

"So …" said Pete, trying to get back into a conversation, " … what have you done here so far?"

"Well, I met a woman called Alathea, who was the old woman who was possessed by the Gelth in 1869," Rose said. "I'm going to get together sometime with her and her grandson. Besides that, I was reading that book in the library, but that's about it. And I ate some chips."

"Oh, well I'd better leave," Pete said. "There's plenty more for you to do."

"You don't have to," Rose said.

"Nah, you should keep exploring," Pete said. "We've got all the time in the world to chat. And whenever you want me, just think of me."

"I know, Nathaniel told me," Rose said.

"Oh, I've met him," Pete said. "When I came here I got a woman called Serena. She left early to meet up with her boyfriend."

"Angels have boyfriends?" Rose said.

"Apparently," Pete said, shrugging. "Anyway, I'll leave you to it."

"Okay," said Rose, giving her father a final hug. "I'll see you round. Love you."

"You too," Pete said with a smile. Then, just like Nathaniel did before, he disappeared. Rose lay down on her bed. It was so good to see her dad again. She wondered who else she'd meet while she was here. But she didn't feel like it now.

_So what do I want to do? _she thought to herself. _I want to … play Scrabble. _A Scrabble board appeared in front of her, as well as the hologram of a person. It was grey and transparent, a bit like how the Cybermen looked when everyone thought they were ghosts.

"Please set level," the hologram said. Rose thought for a moment. She remembered playing Scrabble against the Doctor. For him, a score of 300 was less than satisfactory.

"The mind of an average 12-year-old boy," Rose decided. The hologram then took the shape of a 12-year-old boy.

_This is going to be interesting, _Rose thought.

- - - - - - - - - - - - - - - -

_Next chapter Rose is meeting ... oh, should I spoil the surprise? I'll just say this: all Doctor/Rose shippers hate her. _


	4. Chapter 4

_This chapter was really hard to get done, and I don't like it that much._ _Sorry._

Rose was amazed at the vocabulary of her opponent. She'd beaten him, but only just. The thing was, throughout the game she had felt competitive, but was also impressed with some of the boy's moves.

_I guess in Heaven you can't get angry, _she thought happily. She'd even extended her hand to shake at the end, but the boy had vanished into thin air.

"Now what do I do?" Rose said to herself. She then looked around her room. It was exactly how it had been in the TARDIS. A pile of books in one corner, some photos in the other … she walked over to the photos now. There were heaps with her and the Doctor, but also some of her when she was younger. There was a picture of when she won the bronze medal in the under 7s gymnastics.

"That's what I'll do!" she exclaimed. "Gym!" She was instantly transported to a gymnasium. It looked just like the one back home. It smelt like it too.

"I guess not everything can be perfect," Rose stated. However, the air soon became clearer and fresher. Rose smiled as she hoisted herself up on a beam.

_Wait, what about my clothes? _she thought. But when she looked down at herself, she was now wearing a leotard. She stretched her fingers out and began walking along the beam. It was easier than she remembered. She felt like she could do anything. She decided to test that theory. She closed her eyes and did a cartwheel. She landed perfectly.

"Nathaniel!" she called. Nathaniel appeared in front of her.

"How is it that I can do something that I haven't even attempted in over 10 years?" she asked.

"You can do anything here," Nathaniel said simply. "You can be as good as you want. That is of course unless you're competing against someone. And if you don't want to be fantastic, you don't have to be. You've got all the time in the world to practise and become the Nadia Comaneci you dream to be." Before Rose could respond, Nathaniel vanished. Rose thought about what he'd said.

_Do I really want to be good?_ she asked herself. She decided she'd rather get good on her own. Immediately she lost her balance.

"Okay, here we go," she said.

- - - - - - - - - - - - - - - -

After about an hour, Rose was getting better. She was remembering all the moves she used to know, and trying some new ones. When she fell, she didn't feel any pain. She didn't notice a woman who had been watching her for some time. It was only when she walked up to her that she stopped and looked. The woman was wearing sunglasses. Why, Rose didn't know.

"Impressive," the woman said.

"Thanks," replied Rose. "I'm Rose by the way."

"I thought so," the woman said. "I just wanted to be sure." The woman took off her sunglasses. Rose gasped as she looked into the face of Madam de Pompadour. Rose had a million things she wanted to say to her, but none of them came out.

"Reinette," she breathed. "Er, hi."

"Hi," Reinette said. "Uh, can we talk?"

"About what?" Rose asked.

"I think you know," Reinette answered. Rose sighed.

"Oh, all right," she said. "Your place or mine?"

"Mine," Reinette said. The gym disappeared, and Rose found herself surrounded by 18th century furniture, save the plasma screen, the laptop and the posters of Jude Law.

"Interesting," Rose said. Reinette blushed.

"Please make yourself comfortable," Reinette said.

"Listen Reinette, I just want to get this over with and get out," Rose said.

"Please Rose, I want to _apologise_," Reinette said.

"Huh?" said Rose.

"You heard me," Reinette said. "Listen, the first thing I did after I died was ask about the Doctor. I wanted to know everything about him. I only saw so much when I read his mind."

"You what?" said Rose.

"Never mind," said Reinette. "Anyway, I spent a lot of time watching him on his adventures. It was weird, since it was going through time and I was seeing things that hadn't happened yet or happened years before, but anyway, I've seen his life. I've seen his companions. And … I've seen his relationship with you." Rose looked up.

"I though I was special," continued Reinette. "I thought the Doctor was my guardian angel, when really, he was just stumbling into random bits of my life. But after seeing the way he looks after you, I realised that he was yours."

"Wow, thanks," Rose said.

"Just telling it like it is," said Reinette. "He almost confessed his love for you when he went down into the Pit." Rose's mouth dropped open.

"He … did?" she said.

"I'll show you," Reinette said. She then turned on the plasma TV.

"Doctor ascending into Pit," she said. The screen fuzzed, then came into focus. There was the Doctor, about to drop. Rose watched, anxious.

"_If they get back in touch... if you talk to Rose... just tell her... tell her I … oh, she knows."_

Tears came to Rose's eyes.

"The Doctor didn't love me like I loved him," Reinette said. "But he loved you." Rose slowly nodded.

"I'd like to get to know you Rose," said Reinette. "How about it? Want to make a friend?" Rose thought for a bit, then smiled.

"Sure," she said.

- - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - -

Reinette had been telling Rose about some of the lighter moments in the Doctor's adventures, and Rose was loving it.

"Ha! Seriously?" she said.

"I swear," Reinette said. "But I won't spoil the rest for you, now you can see it yourself."

"Oh yeah," said Rose. "That'll be interesting."

"It's amazing what you can see from here," Reinette said. "For example, I learnt why the clockwork droids wanted my brain."

"Oo, why?" asked Rose.

"The spaceship was called the SS Madam de Pompadour," explained Reinette. "My picture was inside and everything."

"Oh, we must have missed that," Rose said.

"Yeah, the TARDIS was parked right in front of it," Reinette said. Rose started laughing.

"Well I have to say Reinette, I've really enjoyed myself," she said. "You're not the person I thought you were."

"Hey, I've been here for over 200 years, I've had some time to think," reminded Reinette.

"True," said Rose. "Anyway, if you don't mind I think I'll leave now."

"Of course," said Reinette. "There's still much for you to do."

"So everyone keeps saying," Rose said. "Actually, I think I'd really like to see what the Doctor's up to. How do I do that?"

"Just get a TV and tell it what to do," Reinette said. "You can see what he gets up to in the past, the present and the future."

"Don't you think that's like spying?" Rose asked.

"You can only do it if you can justify your reason," Reinette explained. "Like how I wasn't allowed to see into Jude Law's bedroom …"

"Okay, thanks," said Rose, getting up. "So, I just imagine myself back in my room?"

"It's as easy as that," Reinette said. Rose smiled and closed her eyes.

- - - - - - - - - - - - - - -

_I'm not sure who I'm gonna to do next or how this is gonna pan out, so it might be a bit of a wait. Sorry._


	5. Chapter 5

_Wow, I can't believe the encouragement I got for this! Therefore ... I will continue writing it, and trying to update more often. I'll be frank with you - this chapter really didn't do anything for me. However, as long as you guys like it, I'll be happy. _

Rose had decided she'd had enough of meeting people for now. She was more interested in taking what Reinette had said and putting it into practice. She looked at the TV in her room.

"Show … uh, the Doctor after he disappeared from Darlig ulv Stranden," Rose said. The screen flicked on. She watched as the Doctor shed a single tear. His mouth was open, about to say words he'd never have the chance to say. Rose began to cry. Then something odd happened. Out of nowhere, a random bride appeared.

"What the..?!" exclaimed Rose. The Doctor looked just as shocked as her. She watched as the Doctor frantically tried to help this bride, and couldn't help feeling sorry for him. He was forced to swallow everything he'd been feeling and just get back into the routine. How many times had he had to do that before? What that the way he always coped? Did he ever have time to grieve?

_Maybe I can find that out, _Rose thought.

- - - - - - - - - - - - - - -

Rose continued to watch for she didn't know how long. The Doctor had just left Donna. Suddenly there was a knock at the door.

"Er, come in," said Rose. The door opened, and Alathea stepped in.

"Hello Rose," she said. "Not interrupting, am I?"

"Nothing that can't wait," said Rose. "So, have you talked to your grandson?"

"Yep," said Alathea. "He's happy to meet you right now."

"Oh, okay," said Rose. "What are we doing exactly?"

"How do you feel about a nice old-fashioned afternoon tea, complete with tea and scones?" asked Alathea.

"Sounds great," said Rose. In an instant, Rose and Alathea were transported to a beautiful green garden. The smell of flowers was in the air, and there was a white table with food on it. James was sitting on it.

"Hello!" he said brightly. "I'm James."

"I'm Rose," said Rose. James grinned and kissed Rose on the hand, making her blush.

"My lady," he said. "Would you care to take tea with me?"

"I'd love to," said Rose, taking a seat. "So how do you guys spend your time here?"

"Oo, so many ways," said Alathea. "I joined a knitting group. Now I know that might seem a bit cliché, but it's relaxing, and gives me something to concentrate on."

"I've gotten very interested in sports," said James. "I love football. And with over a hundred years of practice, I've gotten quite good."

"How often do you spend watching your loved ones?" asked Rose.

"Well actually, James was an only child, so we don't have many people close to us," said Alathea. "You were watching someone when I came into your room, weren't you?"

"Yeah, the Doctor," answered Rose. "I'm wondering how much of his life I should watch. And whether he'd want me to or not."

"Sorry, who is this Doctor?" asked James.

"Oh yeah, I forgot to tell you about him," said Alathea. "Say, this'll give Rose a good chance to try out the transfer of information. It's a lot more accurate than talking about things."

"What do you do?" asked Rose, intrigued.

"You and James just need to hold hands, and you state what you want to show him," explained Alathea. "The memories and feelings will just flow into his head. Only what you want him to see, of course."

"Okay, I'll give it a go," said Rose. She took James' hands in hers.

"Show my memories of the Doctor," she said. For a moment, James and Rose were still. They didn't move and didn't blink. Alathea watched as the memories were transferred to James. Then, it was over.

"Whoa," said James. "That is one amazing guy. And time travel – cool!"

"Yeah," said Rose. "He was really special."

"And you felt very strong feelings towards him," said James. Rose nodded. They sat in silence for a moment. Then, without warning, a woman of about 70 came appeared next to them.

"Hi Alathea, James," she said. "I was wondering if you were coming to knitting or not?"

"Oh, not today," said Alathea. "I've just been talking to this young woman." She indicated Rose. "Nancy Constantine, this is Rose Tyler." Rose looked at Nancy. Unbelievable. That was the same Nancy she'd met in 1941!

"Rose?" Nancy said. "Is that you?"

"Yep," replied Rose. "And look at you."

"Er, how do you two know each other?" asked James.

"Rose helped save Jamie," said Nancy.

"Oh yeah, how is he?" asked Rose.

"Great," said Nancy. "He's coping so well. He's got a wife, kids, and he'll be a grandfather soon."

"Wow!" said Rose. "And … hey, did she say Nancy Constantine?"

"Doctor Constantine adopted me," said Nancy. "He was so nice. Jamie and I lived with him, he helped get us into school … he was brilliant. He died before the end of the war, but he turned my life around. And now I get to see him every day!"

"Awesome," said Rose.

"And how have you been?" asked Nancy. "You don't look much older than when I last saw you. I guess travelling with the Doctor really took its toll."

"Actually, no," said Rose. "I died _after _I stopped travelling with him."

"Oh," said Nancy. "Well I've been here quite a while. I've met my parents again, and I even met Charles Dickens!"

"Been there, done that," said Rose smiling. "That's how I know Alathea. The Doctor and I ran into her while she was being possessed by a ghost-like alien. James too. He tried to kill me." James blushed.

"Wow, you've certainly lived an interesting life," said Nancy. "Well, I must be off."

"Okay, good to see you," said Rose.

"Yes, see you later Nancy," said Alathea. James smiled and waved. With that, Nancy disappeared into thin air.

"Blimey," said Rose. "It's amazing being able to see so many people again. To have it all at my fingertips. I've got a feeling I'm going to be very happy here."

"Yes, it is quite lovely," said Alathea. "But I'm sure your family must miss you dreadfully. Wouldn't you rather be with them?" Rose pondered this for a moment.

"I'd like to say yes, I really would," she said. "But I didn't belong in that world. The Doctor opened my eyes to the possibilities of life, and showed me what the universe has to offer. Being here almost makes me feel like I'm back in the TARDIS, travelling through time and space. No, I wouldn't rather go back to living my boring, domestic life. Dying was the best thing that could have happened to me." Rose smiled and picked up her cup of tea, while Alathea and James exchanged glances.


	6. Chapter 6

_Really sorry about the delay. I would have gotten this up yesterday, but my brother decided to take the computer hostage, as it were. However that gave me time to do a drawing of David Tennant, so it wasn't all bad. Anyway, here's the next chapter._

Rose had been enjoying her tea for a while, when suddenly Pete appeared.

"Hi Rose," he said. "Sorry to interrupt…"  
"No, it's fine," said Rose. "Dad, this is Alathea and her grandson James."

"How do you do," said Pete, smiling. "Um, do you mind if I have a word with Rose in private?"

"Of course not," replied Alathea. Pete took Rose's arm and dragged her away.

"What's this about, Dad?" asked Rose. Pete bit his lip.

"Listen Rose," he said. "I've got something to tell you. I didn't know if I should or not, but I was talking to my friend Friedrich Nietzsche and he said I should tell you."

"Come on, out with it," said Rose. Pete took a deep breath.

"Okay," he said. "You know how when you and the Doctor met Queen Victoria and the werewolf, the house you were staying in was called Torchwood?"

"Oh yeah, I thought the name sounded familiar," said Rose. "What about it?"

"W-well," said Pete nervously. "After you left, Queen Victoria said that she wanted to create an institute to investigate alien matters on Earth and fight them. She named it …"

"Torchwood," realised Rose. "Oh my g… but that means … she's the reason I'm here! She's the reason I was separated from the Doctor!"

"Well, in a manner of speaking, yes, but-" said Pete.

"I can't believe it!" exclaimed Rose. "We saved her life, and this is how she repays us?! How could she do that?!" Rose looked at her father, tears forming in her eyes. Pete went to comfort her, but before he could she closed her eyes.

_I want to see Queen Victoria, _she thought. And with that she vanished.

- - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - -

Rose found herself standing outside a large wooden door. She went to knock, but before she did so she cried out "Nathaniel!", and at once her angel appeared.

"This had better be important Rose, I'm in the middle of _Deal Or No Deal_," he said.

"Sorry," said Rose. "Um, you know how being in Heaven makes it impossible for you to get angry? Well, I'd like that power removed."

"Uh, I don't think that's such a good idea," he said.

"You don't understand," said Rose. "Behind this door is the reason I cried myself to sleep for months on end. The reason I felt dead inside. The reason I'm not with _him _at the moment. And I need to know what it truly feels like to be facing it."

"I'm sorry, but I can't…" began Nathaniel, but just then a gust of wind started blowing. Rose closed her eyes as it blew away at her soul, giving her the chance to feel everything she used to.

"Thanks," she said.

"It wasn't me," said Nathaniel. "I don't have that power. I think you've just received a gift from upstairs. But be careful. You may find yourself feeling things that are completely overwhelming. Make sure that as soon as you've done what you came here to do, you let Heaven's defences come back. It's for the best." Rose nodded, turned to the door and knocked, and the door was answered by the woman she'd met months beforehand.

"Hello Queen Victoria," Rose said. "You might not remember me …"

"Dame Rose," said Queen Victoria. "Wow, look at you. Um, what can I do for you?"

"I need to come in," said Rose. Queen Victoria nodded and led Rose in.

"Who is it?" called Prince Albert from down the hallway.

"The girl I met at Torchwood House," said Queen Victoria as her husband came into view.

"Oh, hello," Prince Albert said. "Okay, I'll leave you to it then. I'm just going to have a round of golf." He vanished into the air, leaving Rose and Queen Victoria alone.

"Um, would you like a cup of tea?" asked Queen Victoria.

"No," said Rose bluntly. She then closed her eyes and wished for a bowl of chips, which she received. She sat down, picked up a chip and munched on it. Meanwhile, Queen Victoria looked around awkwardly.

"So …" she said, "… this is certainly a surprise. I didn't expect to see you again. And seeing you now … you look just the same as I remember you."

"Well, it hasn't been that long for me," said Rose.

"Oh dear," said Queen Victoria, sighing. "It's such a shame to die young. Though with you, I guess it isn't really a surprise. As much as I hate to say I told you so … I just knew that life you lived wouldn't last very long."

"Yeah," said Rose. "And do you know why my life didn't last as long as I'd like?" Queen Victoria shook her head. "Torchwood. The organisation that _you _set up."

"My dear, Torchwood's intention was never to kill," said Queen Victoria. "It was simply to fight, to defend Great Britain against alien life."

"Oh, they've been doing more than that," said Rose. "Haven't you been watching what's been happening on Earth?"

"Well, since being reunited with my Albert and everything, I guess none of that seemed important anymore," replied Queen Victoria. "Don't you have anyone special up here?"

"The most important person in my life is still down there," said Rose. "Living the fantastic life that, for a time, I lived too. But thanks to your Torchwood, I'll never be with him again." Rose closed her eyes as tears ran down her cheeks. "I'm going to show you something now. I'm going to show you exactly what I went through."

"Um, okay, if you really want to," said Queen Victoria. "So do you want to do the transfer of information?"

"No," answered Rose. "I want you to go through this at the same, painful speed I went through it. Have you got a TV around here?" Queen Victoria pointed to the corner of the room, where a small TV sat.. Rose looked at it.

"Show everything that happened from when I arrived at the Powell Estate to the last time I saw the Doctor!" she exclaimed. Queen Victoria turned around as the TV switched on. It showed the TARDIS materialising in the playground.

"What is this?" she asked.

"Just watch," said Rose.

- - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - -

While Queen Victoria was watching the events unfold, Rose had wished for a portable TV to appear so she could watch the Doctor. He'd just met a woman named Martha Jones. Rose didn't see anything wrong with her, but she was flirting with the Doctor a little more than Rose would have liked. She turned to Queen Victoria, whose heart was breaking as Rose confessed her love to the Doctor. She watched and cried as the Doctor went to reply, but ran out of time. Rose, witnessing the event for a second time, felt the same way she had before, and it made her hatred of the queen even greater.

"You poor child," said Queen Victoria. "I had no idea…"

"Of course you had no idea!" cried Rose. "You've just been sitting up here in your own perfect little world, while meanwhile millions of people have suffered because of you! Normally after the Doctor saves someone's life that person is grateful, but not you!"

"But Rose, I couldn't just sit back and let the Doctor wreak havoc wherever he went," said Queen Victoria. "I had to defend my country."

"But the Doctor doesn't wreak havoc! He saves people from it!" retaliated Rose. "If there was no Doctor, the planet Earth we know wouldn't exist! It'd either be overrun by ghost-like aliens, blown up into pieces powering alien vessels, full of gas-mask zombies …"

"Okay, okay, I get it," said Queen Victoria. "Maybe I was too quick with my decision. But I have to tell you, when I formed Torchwood it was for the greater good. It was so Sir Robert's death wouldn't have been in vain."

"The Doctor's witnessed millions of deaths, but you don't see him setting up organisations for each one, do you?" said Rose. "We tried to make you understand about the werewolf, but you just wouldn't accept it because you weren't comfortable with it. If you just go through life seeing what you want to see and hearing what you want to hear, you'll never be happy. That's why I travelled with the Doctor. It opened my eyes to the reality of the universe. It took me out of my comfort zone, into situations I never would have dreamed of. And I could have died, many times. But I was happy. Happy because I was doing something with my life. Happy because I was making a difference. And happy … because I was with him." Rose put her head in her hands and wiped the tears from her face. Queen Victoria stood behind her.

"You're right," she said quietly. "I was, what can I say, a hypocrite. I refused to listen to the Doctor about the werewolf, but then I set up Torchwood to find out about matters like that. I didn't realise how important what you were doing for me was. I'm sorry. Can you forgive me?" Rose looked up at the old woman, and saw remorse in her eyes. Deep down, she knew it wasn't really Queen Victoria's fault that all this had happened, and yet she was still willing to admit her mistake. Rose smiled.

"Sure," she said. "Now if you'll excuse me, I'd like to get back to watching the Doctor."

"Of course," said Queen Victoria. "Will you pop round again sometime?"

"Maybe," said Rose, before vanishing.

- - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - 

_I hope you enjoyed that._


	7. Chapter 7

_Sorry for the very long delay. _

It was perhaps a week after her arrival (it was even harder to keep track of time here than on the TARDIS) that Rose realised that there were lots of people that she'd met on her travels that she'd like to see again. The problem was that having travelled through time, these people didn't exist yet. And so once again, whilst sitting in her room, she summoned up Nathaniel for some answers.

"Yes Rose, how can I be of assistance?" he asked.

"There were a lot of people that I met that I'd like to see again…" began Rose.

"But having travelled through time they are all scattered through different times, and you're wondering if you can travel through time now to visit them," finished Nathaniel.

"Er, yeah," said Rose. "How did…"

"Whenever we're assigned new people we're always briefed about their circumstances," explained Nathaniel. "These lead onto what a person can and can't do. In the case of time-travellers, like yourself, you are permitted to travel forwards in time as long as you have the specific intention to meet someone you knew before."

"Great!" exclaimed Rose. "I'd really like to check up on someone. We got off to a rough start, she tried to kill me, then she possessed me, but in the end I think she learned her lesson. So how do I get to her?"

"I'll guide you through it, step by step," said Nathaniel. "First, you must…" He stopped as a beeper began to go off.

"Oh nuts," he said. "I've been called to welcome someone new into Heaven. I've gotta go."

"Can't they get someone else to do it?" asked Rose.

"Nope, sorry," replied Nathaniel.

"But can't you be in two places at once?" asked Rose.

"I'm an angel, not God," said Nathaniel. "Here, take this." A booklet appeared out of thin air and landed on the floor. Nathaniel then disappeared.

"Great," sighed Rose, picking up the booklet. "Oh well, let's do this." She looked through the book and found the section that allowed you to travel through time.

" 'First, say out loud the year you wish to go to'," Rose read. "Okay, it was definitely 5 billion and something. But 5 billion and what? … I know – 5 billion/Apple/6! No wait, that was the year of the end of Earth … oh come on, what was it?!" Rose strained her brain trying to think of what the year was. Had Nathaniel stuck around, he would have told her that in Heaven, you can be instantly reminded of things if you want to. Unfortunately Rose wasn't aware of this. She bit her lip in frustration.

"Okay," she said. "I think it was … 5 billion and 53. 5 BILLION AND 53!" Instantly Rose zoomed through time. She landed in the exact same spot, however the room she was in had changed dramatically. Obviously her tastes had changed over time. But something about the room wasn't quite right. It was somehow more … manly.

_Oh God, am I living with a guy? _Rose wondered. She shut the thought out of her mind, dreading that she would one day find love with someone who wasn't the Doctor. She wished she could stay and find out what was going on, but then she remembered the reason why she was here. She hastily looked back at the booklet.

" 'Next, think of the person you want to see'," she continued. She wondered what image she should use. There was pre-surgery Cassandra, and post-surgery Cassandra. Rose decided that now she was in Heaven, Cassandra would want to be young and beautiful again. She thought of her image and she thought of her name. Once again the world around her changed, and she found herself standing outside a large grey door.

"Not very heavenly," she murmured. She then read the sign that was posted on the door – LIFT TO LIMBO.

"Limbo," breathed Rose. "So she didn't make it to Heaven after all." Nervously Rose opened the door. She stepped inside, pressed the single button that was in there and soon the lift was moving. Rose sighed, wondering what Limbo, the place for those who weren't good enough to make it to Heaven, would be like. There was a _ding _as the lift stopped and the doors opened. Rose was just about to consult the booklet for how to find Cassandra, when she saw another door. There was a man standing at the door. Rose walked up to him.

"Um, hello," she said. "I'm looking for someone …"

"Name," said the man.

"Um, mine or theirs?" asked Rose.

"Theirs," stated the man.

"Cassandra O' Brien," said Rose. The man took out a microphone, tapped it, and spoke into it.

"Attention ladies and gentlemen, would Cassandra O' Brien please make her way to the door, you have a guest," he said. He then turned to Rose. "She's on her way out."

"Thanks," said Rose. "So what are you, an angel?"

"Me? Nah," said the man. "I'm just a guy who died and went to Limbo. I used to spend my days with the rest of the guys, then I was promoted to monitor them."

"Do you think you'll make it to Heaven?" asked Rose.

"Dunno," admitted the man. "I'd like to. Maybe in a few thousand years if I'm lucky." Rose gaped.

"Th-thousand?" she stammered. The man laughed.

"I take it you ain't been dead long," he said.

"About a week," said Rose.

"There you go," said the man. "You have no idea about the way time passes here. A hundred years feels like it goes by in a second. A thousand years every minute. The universe moves on around you, and you're stuck here in the same old place, wishing every day that you didn't bomb those buildings and you didn't kill those hostages." Rose slowly backed away as the man recounted his messed-up life. At last the door opened, and Cassandra walked out.

"Oh my goodness," she said. "Rose Tyler."

"Cassandra," acknowledged Rose. "Hi."

"Hi," said an astounded Cassandra. "Um, we've only got ten minutes. Shall we go somewhere a little more private?"

"Yeah, sure," said Rose. "Do you want to transport us or shall I?"

"Transport?" said Cassandra. "Ah yes, you Heaveners can do that can't you?"

"Heaveners?" questioned Rose.

"Just our little nickname for you," explained Cassandra. "Being in Heaven and being in Limbo are completely different things. You've got powers. We don't."

"Oh," said Rose. "Um, right. Let's go." Rose shut her eyes, and when she opened them she was in a large white room.

"We're not allowed much here, even the rooms we speak to visitors in are a blank canvas," said Cassandra, sighing.

"So what do you get up to in Limbo anyway?" asked Rose. Cassandra groaned.

"It's like a mix of school detention and Alcoholics Anonymous," she said. "On one hand, you've got the line writing and the banning of things that could keep us entertained. But then there's the confessing of our sins and the discussion of our feelings. And I've gotta tell you – it doesn't get any easier with time."

"So how do you get to Heaven?" Rose asked.

"You've got to be truly, completely sorry about your sins," said Cassandra. "I made it this far because when I was possessing that diseased girl, I realised what it felt like to be her. It was then that I learned how to truly empathise with someone, which made me feel bad about the things I'd done. But while being in that situation certainly humbled me, I've still got a long way to go to fully make up for what I've done. I suppose you got a free pass into Heaven then?"

"Um, if you're implying that I didn't have to go through here first, yes, that's correct," replied Rose.

"Thought so," said Cassandra. "I saw the things you and the Doctor did to save the universe. I knew a few white lies here and there would be cancelled out by the whole saving the world thing."

"What white lies?" questioned Rose.

"You know, lies about not being head-over-heels for the Doctor," said Cassandra cheekily. "I was in your head, I know how you felt about him." Rose lowered her head at this statement, and Cassandra realised she'd touched on a fragile subject. She cleared her throat.

"So anyway, being in Limbo sure isn't the best life, but hey, at least I'm not in Hell," she said. Rose gulped.

"So … there really is a Hell?" she said, lowering her voice.

"Oh yes," confirmed Cassandra. "At least that's what we've been told, and I doubt the angels would be allowed to lie to us, right? They've told us the most terrible things about it."

"It's not all caverns and fire and sulfur is it?" asked Rose.

"No," said Cassandra. "Apparently Hell and the home of Satan are two separate things. Satan was trapped in the place you think of as Hell before the universe began, on a cursed planet that no one was meant to reach." Rose's eyes widened. "But it was only his body that was trapped. His mind wandered, corrupting whoever it could. But the souls of the damned couldn't go to the place where Satan was held. They were given a much worse fate."

"What is it?" whispered Rose. Cassandra leaned forward, her eyes dark.

"Imagine a place with no light, no dark, no hot, no cold, no air, no life," she said. "A place where your soul is doomed to wander for eternity, frightened and oh so alone. A place where the world whizzes by around you, but you can't reach it." Rose sat back, a sick feeling forming in the pit of her stomach.

"Oh God," she said. "The Void."

"What?" said Cassandra.

"I know the place," said Rose, her eyes wild with fear. "I was seconds away from being trapped there forever."

"But that's impossible," said Cassandra. "A passage between Hell and Earth can't be formed."

"Yes it can," said Rose. "It was because of that passage that I was trapped in a parallel universe. The universe that took me away from the Doctor. The universe that caused my death."

"Oh … damn," said Cassandra. "I had no idea…"

"No, thank you," said Rose. "I thought being trapped there forever would be bad enough, but to think that it's haunted by the souls of the dead…" Rose shivered. "I always hated my parallel dad for catching me, for taking me away from the Doctor. But now I realise that compared to what could have happened, I'm lucky. I'm really lucky." Rose closed her eyes, and Cassandra put an arm around her. It was amazing to see just how much this young girl had been through. Cassandra herself had lived for over 2,000 years, but even if she'd had another 2,000 she wouldn't see half as much as Rose had seen. It was then that she realised that it's not how much time you get, but what you do with it.

Just then a bell sounded, and Cassandra knew her time was up.

"Okay, I've got to get back now," she said. "Come and visit me again, yeah?" Rose nodded. They teleported back, and Cassandra walked inside. As she waved to Rose, there was something in her face that Rose swore wasn't there before. But before she could stick around to find out, the man that had spoken to her before waved her away, so Rose slowly made her way back into the lift.

- - - - - - - - - - - - - - - -

_I've got an idea for the next chapter, so it shouldn't be too long. For those of you who want to know who Rose will meet, the year she is in is a major clue._


	8. Chapter 8

_Okay, that delay was a little longer than expected. The thing is, I wrote the first part of this ages ago, but couldn't find time to finish it. However, it's done now (thank God, my wrists are killing me), so I hope you enjoy it._

As the lift took Rose back to Heaven, she attempted to shake off the eerie feeling her talk with Cassandra had given her. What did that feeling remind her of?

"The Void Ship!" she realised. No wonder it had had such a wrong feeling about it. Not only was it outside of time and space, but there was every chance that the ghost of Hitler had passed it on occasion. The lift stopped, and the doors opened. It was now that Rose noticed where she was – it was the valley she'd woken up in. As she looked forward now, she could see a body stirring.

_A new arrival_, she thought. _I may as well welcome them. _She started making her way towards the person. But as she got closer, she sensed something very familiar about them. She stopped dead as she realised who it was.

"Jack!"

- - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - -

Captain Jack Harkness opened his eyes.

_Where am I? _he thought. The last thing he remembered was talking to the Doctor, warning him of the Master, and then…

"I'm … dead," he said to himself. "But what's going on? I've died so many times before, and all I've seen is darkness…" He gasped as he looked down at his body. He reached up and touched his face.

"I'm back," he whispered. He then heard his name called, and turned around. A massive grin spread over his face.

"Rose!" he called. Rose started running towards him, and he caught her in a big hug.

"Oh Jack!" Rose exclaimed. "I've missed you so much!"

"Ditto," replied Jack, kissing Rose on the forehead. Rose looked at him strangely.

"What's with your voice?" she asked. Jack realised that he had been speaking with his 'wise old man' accent, so he cleared his throat and began talking in his old American accent.

"Sorry, picked up the accent a while back," he said. "But how am I here? And how are you here? You're meant to be trapped in a parallel universe."

"I died Jack," said Rose. "And I ended up here. Same as you. We're in Heaven."

"But I've died tons of times," said a confused Jack. "Then I've woken up after each of them. Remember what you did to me Rose?" Rose cocked her head to one side, but suddenly her memories of absorbing the time vortex came flooding back. She brought her hand to her mouth.

"Oh crap," she said. "But … wait. That was in the year 200,100. And what did you mean about dying tons of times?"

"You couldn't control what you were doing," explained Jack. "You brought me back to life … thanks, by the way … permanently. Well, 5 billion years is just as good as permanent." Rose couldn't believe her ears. She'd never really asked the Doctor what had happened to Jack. He'd made that one vague comment about him 'rebuilding the Earth', then he'd never mentioned him again.

"Jack, what happened to you after I brought you back to life?" she asked.

"Well, first I cleared up a few things on the Gamestation, then I set about finding you and the Doctor," said Jack. "Unfortunately I ended up in 1869. From there I lived on, barely ageing a day. I kept living, while everyone around me died." Rose gulped.

"_Humans decay. You wither and you die."_

"You sound like the Doctor," she said. "You look different too. There's something about your face. It looks … harder." Jack nodded.

"Yeah, seeing what I've seen will do that to you," he said. "It changes you forever. You know, you look kinda different too. No offence, but something looks missing. And I think I can guess what."

"_The Doctor_," they said in unison, before Rose continued. "Losing him was the worst thing that ever happened to me. All because of bloody Torchwood…" Jack scratched his head.

"Yeah, um … I worked for Torchwood," he admitted. Rose gasped, but he hastily kept talking. "Torchwood Cardiff – it was totally different. I had a small team, and we waited for trouble to come to us, not the other way around. Believe me Rose, I had nothing to do with Canary Wharf." Although shocked at this revelation, Rose knew that she could trust Jack, so she simply nodded.

"So did you ever get to see the Doctor again?" she asked.

"Yep, quite a few times actually," said Jack. "I got to see some of his past incarnations from a safe distance – you're lucky you missed them. And I met the pretty boy our one turned into. Oh, I also met some companions. You do know that he had other companions, right?"

"Too well," said Rose. "I met one of them. I've also been watching what the Doctor's been up to. It's great – here you can watch practically anything you want."

"Really?" said Jack suggestively. "How?"

"You can get started as soon as you find the piece of paper, where is it? … oh, I was standing on it." Rose bent down and picked up the piece of paper intended for Jack. He took it, but before looking at it, looked at Rose.

"Rose, do you have any idea of why you brought me back to life?" he asked her. "I mean, it was a nice gesture and all, but so many people died that day. Why me?" Rose closed her eyes and concentrated hard on remembering. She could now clearly remember what she'd done easily enough, but why?

Suddenly her mind became flooded with images. It was as if she once again had the time vortex running through her head. She was once again seeing all that is, all that was, and all that ever could be. And among those images, she saw Jack. She saw him in the past, the present and the future. She saw him watching over her as she grew up. She saw everything he'd done when he was a time agent. She saw everything he'd done for Torchwood. And she saw the day when he decided what he needed to do.

"_Jack, you're being ridiculous."_

"_No I'm not. I can't continue living like this. I'm not a normal person, and I don't want to pretend to be."_

"_But think of what you're giving up!"_

"_I'm so old now, I don't want to be Captain Jack Harkness anymore. Captain Jack Harkness is dead. I want to be something more. Something new."_

"_But the radiation could kill you!"_

"_That's where you're wrong."_

…

…

"_Jack … Jack …"_

"_What happened?"_

"_You did it Jack. I wouldn't believe it if I didn't see it myself, but you did it. Your cells and body structure has been completely changed. No one will recognise you. You look … like an alien."_

"_Let me see … yes, I see what you mean. The jawline could have been a bit tighter, but other than that I'm reasonably happy with it."_

"_You're serious? You want to look like that for the rest of your life? You do realise that you'll need 24 hour care. You'll need to live in this tank forever."_

"_Then that's what will happen. With the death of Jack Harkness, a new being is born. A legendary being. From now on, I shall be the Face of Boe."_

After this came various other events in Jack's life. From the birth of his children to witnessing the destruction of Earth, and then his final death and his warning of the Master's return. Finally, Rose opened her eyes, and found herself gasping for breath.

"It was meant to happen," she realised. "If I hadn't done it, it would have been a paradox. The whole of history could have changed. Jack, it was your destiny that you be brought back to life, so that you could become the legend of the universe." Jack bowed his head.

"Well it's an honour to have fulfilled that role," he said. "I'm glad that I could contribute so much to the universe. I guess that's what got me here. Still, I wish I could remember what I got up to in the time agency. And meet some of my old buddies."

"You can," said Rose. "All you've got to do is read the piece of paper. Oh, and if you come across me, I might not remember this conversation that well. I'm actually visiting here from the year 2007 right now."

"Oh, okay," said Jack. "So you can travel in time here?"

"Yep," confirmed Rose. "And I'd better be getting back to my own time. So … see ya in 5 billion years, yeah?"

"Yeah," said Jack, laughing. They hugged one last time, before Rose transported herself back to her own time. Jack sighed and opened up the piece of paper that he'd been waiting 5 billion years to receive.

- - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - -

_So that's my little explanation about how Jack became the Face of Boe. I also like to think that Rose brought him back permanently on purpose, so I included that as well._

_For those of you who have read **Hello Dolly!**/are fans of The Chaser, guess who I'm meeting again in about 15 hours time? _


	9. Christmas Special

_I can't believe how long it's been! This is just a pointless little chapter to let you all know that I haven't abandoned this – it's just hard to write, especially with the other fics I'm working on. It might also be a bit offensive to those of you who are very religious.  
_

"Rose," whispered Pete, "wake up." Rose slowly stirred from her sleep. Although she didn't technically need to sleep, she still enjoyed it. Besides, she had eternity to do everything else.

"What?" she said.

"Oh, that's a nice way to greet your father on this special day," said Pete. Rose raised an eyebrow.

"Special?" she questioned. Pete rolled his eyes.

"It's Christmas!" he exclaimed. "Haven't you seen the notices, heard the announcements, received the memos?"

"I've been distracted," admitted Rose. Over the past few weeks, Rose had found herself reading, playing sports, meeting celebrities, and of course, watching the Doctor. She was actually getting a bit concerned – Martha Jones was getting awfully close to him, at least wanting to…

"You're going to _love _Christmas in Heaven, Rose!" said Pete enthusiastically. "For one thing, you can eat as much turkey as you want and not get fat."

"Isn't that gluttony?" enquired Rose.

"Plus there's music and celebrations … and you'll get to see the birthday boy!" continued Pete, grinning. Rose's jaw dropped.

"I'm going to see Jesus?" she asked.

"That's right," confirmed Pete. "So come on!"

* * *

Later, Rose was with all her friends at a giant Christmas party. There had been singing all day, and she still wasn't sick of it. When she was alive, she'd never been one to go to church on Christmas (or any time for that matter), but she supposed there was something about the atmosphere in Heaven that made the difference. That and the fact that Jesus himself was sitting on stage, happily drinking from a golden goblet.

"Thank you everyone!" he said, standing up. "I'm so thrilled that you could all be here to celebrate my 2007th birthday. The fact that there are so many of you here tonight truly represents the number of people who have listened to God over the years and have lived according to His will. And then there are the people who just got lucky." There was laughter from the crowd.

"And now," continued Jesus, "for the final event, a Christmas tradition since his passing in 1989, please welcome Graham Chapman!" Rose cocked her head to one side. She didn't see what Graham Chapman, former member of Monty Python had to do with Christmas. But as he walked onto the stage, she suddenly remembered a scene from _Monty Python's The Meaning of Life._ And that's exactly what she got. Graham grinned, held up his microphone and began singing.

_"It's Christmas in Heaven,  
All the children sing,  
It's Christmas in Heaven,  
Hark hark those church bells ring  
It's Christmas in Heaven,  
The snow falls from the sky  
But it's nice and warm and everyone  
Looks smart and wears a tie_

"Jesus likes Monty Python?" Rose whispered to Alathea.

"He has a sense of humour," replied Alathea.

_It's Christmas in Heaven,  
There's great films on TV –  
_"_The Sound of Music" twice an hour  
And "Jaws" I, II, and III.  
There's gifts for all the family,  
There's toiletries and trains  
There's Sony Walkman Headphone sets  
And the latest video games._

James added, "Last year he held a _South Park_ marathon showing every episode he appeared in!" Rose giggled.

_It's Christmas it's Christmas in Heaven!  
Hip hip hip hip hip hooray!  
Every single day  
Is Christmas day._

_It's Christmas it's Christmas in Heaven!  
Hip hip hip hip hip hooray!  
Every single day,  
Is Christmas day!"_

Afterwards, Rose was headed off to her room. But Pete stopped her just in time.

"You know we don't really give Christmas presents here, because you can wish for whatever you want?" he said.

"Yeah, fair enough," said Rose.

"Well…" said Pete, "I've tracked down something I think you'll be very interested in. I consider it my Christmas present to you."

"What is it?" asked Rose excitedly.

"Come with me," said Pete.

- - - - - - - - - - - - - - - -

_Until next time…_


	10. Chapter 10

_I know what you're thinking - this can't __be montypython203. Montypython203 would never update so quickly. Well believe it or not, here I am. Just don't get used to it!_

_Lots of references to the classic series in this one._

Rose felt the excitement swelling up inside her as her father put his hands over her eyes. She felt herself quickly disappear, then materialise in, presumably, the location of her "present".

"Can I open my eyes yet?" she asked.

"Almost," replied Pete, walking her over to a door. "Okay – now." He took his hands away, leaving Rose to look at the door in front of them. She read the sign on it aloud.

"'Companions, Assistants and Associates of … the Doctor!'" she exclaimed, turning to face Pete.

"That's right," Pete confirmed. "There are a number of groups here for every hobby and obsession, and I wondered if there'd be one for people who had been in your situation. I was right." Rose grinned, then froze.

"When I met Sarah Jane, I realised that I wasn't the first of the Doctor's companions," she said. "Now I'm going to find out just how many there have been before me."

"_Not _that that matters," said Pete. "Think about it – would you only go out with someone if they'd never gone out with anyone else?"

"I suppose not," reasoned Rose. "Okay, I can do this. Wish me luck."

"Good luck," said Pete, giving his daughter a hug. "Tell me how it goes." Rose nodded, and opened the door.

* * *

Rose had to admit – she'd expected a few more people than this. There were only about half a dozen people in the room. Even worse, they were all fairly young. Had all these people died as a result of travelling with the Doctor? As if to answer her thoughts, a young man wearing a kilt strode up to her.

"I know what you're thinking," he said in a Scottish accent. "Did we all die young?"

"Er, yeah," said Rose.

"Don't worry, lassie," the man assured her. "This room is designed so that we all look and feel as young as we did when we travelled with the Doctor. I didna actually die when I was with him."

"Speak for yourself," muttered a girl from the back of the room.

"Och aye, sorry Katarina," said the man, before turning back to Rose. "Hello, I'm Jamie McCrimmon."

"Hi, I'm Rose Tyler," said Rose. Jamie froze.

"R-Rose Tyler?" he stammered. "_The _Rose Tyler?"

"Rose Tyler?!" cried a commanding voice from the corner of the room. "Did someone say Rose Tyler?"

"Aye, it's her Brigadier!" exclaimed Jamie. A tall, distinguished looking man with a moustache walked up to Rose.

"Good lord, it is!" he said. "By Jove, it's good to meet you! We all know so much about you! Come in, come in!" Rose followed the Brigadier into the room, while Jamie closed the door behind her.

"How do you know who I am?" questioned Rose as she took a seat at the table in the middle of the room.

"How do we know indeed," said a kind looking young woman sitting opposite her. "We like to keep as up-to-date with the Doctor's adventures as possible. He changed all our lives." The man sitting next to the woman took her hand in his.

"So true, Barbara," he said. "He made us see things in perspective and realise what was truly important in life." He squeezed Barbara's hand, causing her to blush and murmur, "Thanks Ian."

"Right," said Rose. "So you're all the Doctor's past companions?"

"Well…" said Jamie, "technically the Doctor has had many more companions than us. We're just those who died some time before the present day."

"Or in the future, but were originally born in the past so went back to the time when we died," added Katarina.

"Or were born in the future, but decided to stay in the past, so when we died our spirits went to the time period we desired," said a young girl who was sitting next to Katarina.

"I think that's a bit much for her, Vicki," said Katarina.

"And we're not just companions, young lady," said the Brigadier. "I was technically the Doctor's employer and superior back in the day. He always went gallivanting off in the TARDIS when he was under specific instructions not to go anywhere."

"That sounds like the Doctor," said Rose, smiling. "But, back to me for a sec. You all seemed quite … let's say _in awe _when I told you who I was."

"How could we not be?" said Jamie. "You've been through so much with the Doctor. You looked into the time vortex to save his life. I wouldna even be able to figure that out, let alone _do_ it."

"I only wish I could have been around to stop that wretched Torchwood from causing the Battle of Canary Wharf," said the Brigadier. Ian and Barbara slightly lowered their heads.

"What is it?" asked Rose. Ian sighed.

"That's how we…" he began.

"Oh," said Rose, realising immediately what he meant. "I'm so sorry."

"Hey, we're still here, aren't we?" said Ian, laughing slightly. "It just gets a bit hard sometimes watching my son and not being able to help him."

"But anyway," said Jamie quickly, "when you disappeared through to the parallel universe, we didna know what happened to you. We couldna see what you were up to, or how you were coping."

"Ah," said Rose. "Admittedly, it was hard. Really hard. But I tried to move on, and that was why I joined the parallel Torchwood. That's what ended up killing me, sort of." Just then, the door opened, and a young girl wearing a Victorian dress entered.

"Hello everyone," she said.

"Hey Victoria," said Jamie. "How are you?"

"Not bad," replied Victoria. Jamie turned to Rose to explain.

"This is Victoria," he said. "She used to travel with the Doctor too, but she couldna cope with the pressure and ended up leaving."

"I visit sometimes to catch up on news, but I'm not desperate," said Victoria. "Say, you look familiar…"

"Yes, it's Rose Tyler," said Barbara. "Remember her?"

"Yes, of course!" realised Victoria. "You're one of the most devoted companions I've seen."

"Oi, I was pretty devoted," defended Jamie. "I lost my memory because of those bloody Time Lords." Rose gasped.

"The Time Lords…" she said, "…are they here? The Time War…"

"Well that's a rather complex matter," said the Brigadier. "The Time War was held in the far future, with all of existence at stake. The Doctor had found a way to kill the Daleks – he had in his possession a weapon that could, effectively, mean that they and their planet never existed. Unfortunately, using that weapon meant sacrificing Gallifrey as well. That's why the Doctor can never even see his planet again – because it technically never existed. But everything that happened up until that point still happened. The Doctor and the other Time Lords was still born, the Daleks still invaded Earth several times, etc. But the chances of running into another Dalek that pre-dated the Time War would be impossible." Rose scratched her head.

"That sounds like a paradox," she said. There were a few nods from around the room.

"I think," said Jamie, "as the Doctor would say, it's a wee bit _timey wimey_."

"Anyway," said the Brigadier, "to answer your question Miss Tyler, the Time Lords would have come to Heaven at their time of death, which was, or will be, around the year 5 billion." Suddenly, the realisation dawned on Rose about just how significant her first trip in the TARDIS had been. At first she'd thought that seeing the destruction of Earth was the Doctor's way of showing her how he'd felt. But then she realised – _he _was using the experience to re-live the pain himself. Rose went to speak, but no sound came out.

"Take your time, we all know how you feel," said Ian. "Even for those of us who didn't know the Doctor for very long, we've been following him very closely to better understand him. Barbara and I have only been here a short time, and already what we've seen is overwhelming."

"I'll bet," said Rose. "So is that what you guys do? Meet up here and discuss the Doctor?"

"Basically," said Vicki. "He's the one thing that we all have in common. Mind you, we may talk about other things, like people we've just met or what's happening on Earth at the moment. When you think about it, it's quite similar to Elton Pope and his group, L.I.N.D.A." Rose's brow furrowed.

"He upset my mum," she stated.

"Aye, as you've said several times," said Jamie. "Well, if you're interested in coming back, we meet here every Wednesday at 10 p.m. But don't worry – normally if we're free at any other time we'll let you know. The timing's just in case you've got other things on. Which reminds me – I've got to go. I've got a reconciliation meeting with some Red Coats."

"And I've got to see some old army friends," said the Brigadier. "Have you joined any other groups yet, Rose?"

"Can't say I have," admitted Rose. "I was just an ordinary person until I met the Doctor."

"We've all been there," said Barbara. "Don't worry – from what I've seen you're a lovely girl, and I'm sure you'll be making friends in no time."

"Thanks," said Rose. "Well, I guess I'll be going too. Thanks for talking with me." She waved, then headed out the door. And she couldn't stop smiling.

- - - - - - - - - - - - - - - -

_A lot of people have requested that Rose meets past companions, but I had to consider those who came for the future.  
_

_BTW, my idea for the Time War is just a theory._


	11. Chapter 11

_Oh God, the guilt! We had an all day teacher strike today, and I barely did anything at all. In order to make the day less than a complete waste of time, I wrote this chapter. It crosses over into **Torchwood**._

Rose had been enjoying herself a lot more now that she had the Doctor's previous companions to talk to. They were the only other people who really understood everything that she'd been through, everything she'd seen and done. And now she had someone to discuss the Doctor's adventures with. For example, everyone agreed that the Doctor's recent adventure with the living sun had borne quite a resemblance to his adventures on the Bitter Pill...

"So tell me," said Rose one session, "did you guys ever meet any famous or historical figures while travelling with the Doctor?" Barbara grinned.

"Plenty," she said. "Ian and I met Marco Polo, Emperor Nero, Richard the Lionheart ... it was a history teacher's dream!"

"I met a future dictator who looked exactly like the Doctor!" remarked Jamie proudly.

"I met rather a large number of government officials, does that count?" asked the Brigadier. "Oh I know it's not much compared to you Miss Tyler, with your Queen Victorias and your Charles Dickenses..." Rose's jaw dropped open.

"That reminds me!" she exclaimed. "I was always hoping that if I died, I could talk to Gwyneth again. You know – the maid who helped us close the rift?"

"Of course," said Ian. "She was a very brave girl."

"Right, that settles it," announced Rose. "I'm gonna go see her. Sorry to leave so soon."

"Don't worry about it!" insisted Barbara. "You go catch up with your friend. Then tell us all about it later."

"I will," replied Rose. "See you later." Rose stood still, closed her eyes, and thought of Gwyneth. She couldn't remember exactly what she looked like, their encounter had been so long ago, but she had a fair idea. When she opened her eyes she was, as usual, in front of a door. Rose grinned in excitement as she knocked. She heard movement from the other side, and then the door slowly opened.

"Rose Tyler!" exclaimed Gwyneth as she opened the door.

"Hi!" said Rose enthusiastically, giving Gwyneth a hug. "How are you?"

"Er ... great!" replied Gwyneth, overwhelmed. "Please, come in! It's so good to see you again."

"You too," said Rose, stepping inside. Gwyneth hastily shut the door and showed Rose in. "Please, sit down, sit down!"

"Thanks," said Rose. "You know, I remember something you said to me once. About being with your parents in paradise. I'm glad to know that you got to see them again."

"And you've been reunited with your da, no doubt," said Gwyneth. Rose nodded.

"Listen, Gwyneth..." she said, "I can't tell you how bad I feel about what happened. The Doctor and I got messed up in your life. If it wasn't for us, you wouldn't have..."

"Don't worry about it," said Gwyneth. "It was _my _decision, remember? And if I recall correctly, you didn't even want me to do it."

"I guess so," said Rose. "But Gwyneth, there's something I need to ask. The Doctor told me that you were physically dead when you blew that house up. Is that true?"

"Ah, I had a feeling you were going to ask about that," said Gwyneth. "And not just because I'm psychic." She sat down, trying to put her thoughts into words. "Okay, it's like this. When I stepped under that arch, I just felt all the life drain away from me. I didn't realise what had happened – I just thought it was part of the process. As the Gelth kept coming through me, I realised just how cold I felt. I felt like there was something missing. It was while you and the Doctor were trapped behind the bars that I realised that I'd died."

"But how were you still conscious?" asked Rose.

"I think the Gelth still needed my soul, as well as my body, to get through the rift," explained Gwyneth. "After all, _that _was the part of me that had been affected for all those years. But when I struck that match, it was enough to release me."

"How did you figure that out?" questioned Rose. Gwyneth smiled.

"I had, let's say, an epiphany," she said. "As it turns out, my parents were sending me a message, telling me what to do and not to be frightened. The Doctor told me my parents would give me the strength – he was right."

"The Doctor's good like that," said Rose, smiling. Gwyneth suddenly looked at Rose, a serious look on her face.

"That's partly why I was so excited to see you again," she said. "I wanted to talk to you about what I saw in you that night."

"The things I'd seen, the darkness, the big bad wolf..." said Rose. Gwyneth shook her head.

"No, not those things," she said. "I'm talking about the more spiritual side. Rose Tyler, you had an aura."

"Oh yeah?" said Rose. "I've heard about these things. Like a shadow that glows around me."

"Yes, yes," confirmed Gwyneth. "And yours was amber."

"And what does that mean exactly?" enquired Rose.

"Personal strength and courage," said Gwyneth. "And the power I got from it was intense. But it changed when you were around the Doctor. It became a soft pink - which means true love." Rose sighed.

"I suppose that would make sense," she said.

"It was radiating so much energy," said Gwyneth. "So much love. And when you and the Doctor were behind the bars, holding each other's hands, it just burst into my vision. Two figures surrounded by this pink light. And it proved to me that what you and the Doctor had was the most beautiful thing I'd ever seen." Rose couldn't help but smile. She knew she should have been devastated – knowing that having been separated from the Doctor, she'd lost something that was even more important than she realised. But it also made her think of how grateful she was to have had that time with him.

"Not many people can have that kind of love for another person, or receive it," said Gwyneth. "And I'm sorry that you didn't get more time with him."

"Thanks," said Rose. "_I'm _sorry that you never got to see that butcher's boy of yours again while you were still alive. I take it you've caught up now?"

"Oh, absolutely," said Gwyneth, blushing. "Turned out he liked me too."

"Oo, does he now?" teased Rose. "That's great Gwyneth. I'm really happy for you. I guess coming here has made you complete."

"Well, almost," admitted Gwyneth. "But technically, I'm not a hundred percent complete."

"Sorry?" said a confused Rose.

"That night, when I closed the rift," said Gwyneth. "Something happened in the explosion. As I died, a tiny part of me escaped through the rift. It moved through the rift, forwards in time. It finally stopped – colliding with the conception of a child."

"What are you saying?" asked Rose. Gwyneth took a deep breath.

"I have ... a clone," she said. "I don't know how it happened, but that part of me ended up as part of this child. That child is grown up now." Gwyneth turned to her television set.

"Show Gwen Cooper," she commanded. The screen flickered into life, and Rose was shocked to see this woman, who looked exactly like Gwyneth, on the screen.

"She looks just like you!" Rose exclaimed.

"Looks just like me, sounds just like me," said Gwyneth, "even her name is close to mine. She was conceived on the rift – in the same spot that I died. Not only that, but she can communicate with ghosts, she has visions, and she can resurrect the dead."

"Blimey," said Rose.

"She works for Torchwood now," said Gwyneth. "Her boss is a nice man named Captain Jack Harkness." Rose gaped.

"As in brown hair, cheeky smile, incredibly good-looking Captain Jack Harkness?" she asked.

"Why, yes," said Gwyneth. "How did you...?"

"Oh Gwyneth," said Rose. "Now it's time for me to tell _you_ a story..."

- - - - - - - - - - - - - - - -

_Gwen has always bugged me in her similarities to Gwyneth, so I developed this theory to explain it.  
_  
_Fun fact: That idea about Gwyneth telling Rose her aura sparked from fantasies I had about a year and a half ago where her ghost would visit Rose and tell her her aura ... and that the Doctor was her true love. Meanwhile, the ghost of Pete would visit the Doctor._


	12. Chapter 12

_That's right - another update. You guys keep me going with all your wonderful reviews :)_

After a long day exchanging stories about Jack (some more inappropriate than others), Rose decided that she'd take some time to watch him in his life, as well as the Doctor. But as time passed, she got so carried up in watching them both that she began to feel guilty that she wasn't doing anything else with her time. So she took Barbara's suggestion, and joined other groups. She worked a bit more on her gymnastics, but it was only fun for so long. She tried taking an appreciation in the arts, but unfortunately Beethoven just wasn't her thing. Eventually she joined a book club, and found the experience surprisingly enjoyable. And with every new book she picked up, she felt the urge to write something herself. Ever since travelling with the Doctor, her mind had been opened up to new, amazing ideas, and she desperately wanted a way to get them down.

"I want to write a book," she announced one day during the group's meeting.

"That's not unusual," said Yi Qing, the middle-aged Chinese woman who sat next to her. "Many people use the time they have here to write. The atmosphere of Heaven gives them a clearer head."

"Furthermore," added Tom, the African boy, "there are plenty of authors up here to help you develop your writing skills. Jane Austen, J.R.R. Tolkien, H.G. Wells…" As Tom continued to list authors, a grin formed on Rose's face. There was one author she particularly wanted to see – especially since she'd already met him once.

* * *

Rose was a little annoyed to discover that Mr Dickens was already in the middle of a writing class when she called on him. But as soon as he saw her face, he shooed the other person away like there was no tomorrow.

"Rose Tyler!" he exclaimed.

"You remember me then," said Rose.

"How could I not? You and the Doctor opened my mind up to the possibilities of life, making me realise how little knowledge I had," replied Charles. "I don't suppose the Doctor's here now?"

"Oh, I think it'll be a few years before he makes an appearance," said Rose. "But the reason I came round is because I was wondering if you could help me learn to write."

"Of course, of course!" said Charles. "I thoroughly enjoy passing on what I know, especially to those who are willing to learn."

"Believe me, I'm willing," promised Rose. "My mind is just full of ideas, and I want to find a way to express them. I've read a few of your novels, and the eloquence and brilliance in your writing just blows me away." Charles blushed a little.

"Most people save that kind of praise for Shakespeare," he remarked.

"Oh, I could never understand him," said Rose. "The Doctor says he's brilliant, but he's just not my cup of tea." Charles' face fell a little.

"I thought he was my biggest fan," he said soflty. Rose cleared her throat.

"So, how do we do this?" she asked. "How do I start off?" Charles looked at Rose.

"I suppose you'll be expecting something along the lines of 'Introduction, Complication, Resolution, Conclusion'," he surmised.

"That's what I learned in school," admitted Rose.

"Forget it," commanded Charles. "I find that style of writing so formulaic, so cliché. And while it might work for some people, I prefer to grow with my characters and learn from them. While I might have a rough idea of where a story is headed, I did tend to change ideas along the way. You know how I wrote my novels in weekly or monthly instalments?" Rose nodded. "Well, the advantage of that was that I could wait to hear the opinions of my readers before publishing the next chapter. Then, I may have altered the story based on what they had to say."

"Good idea," admitted Rose.

"Yes – it's a technique often employed by up-and-coming writers on the Internet," said Charles. "There are websites that allow writers to post stories and receive reviews, so the author gets a consistent response to their work all the way through writing it. You know," he brought Rose closer to him, "between you and me, some of the writers on these websites are actually _like us_." Rose looked at him blankly, causing Charles to roll his eyes. "Some of the writers, are _here_." Rose's eyes widened.

"They're _dead_?" she asked. "You mean God actually allows dead people to post stories on the Internet?"

"Stories, fanvids, fanart," said Charles. "As long as they don't give anything away, who's to know?"

"Whoa," said an amazed Rose. "That's kind of … eerie."

"But I'm getting off track," said Charles, getting back on the subject. "So as I said, writing in instalments is good. But you don't have to if you don't want to. The point is that if you realise that something works better another way, just let it happen. If you get completely off track, let the characters slowly make their way back to where they were. Never abandon a project – leave it for a while if you're stuck, but one day you may come back to it and suddenly be inspired. And most importantly, write from your heart, and the words will just flow." Rose nodded, taking everything Charles said in. He had some good points.

"Is it really that easy?" she asked. Charles sighed.

"I'll admit it – some people are just born with the will to be creative and put everything onto paper," he said. "Some people don't really feel that will, but if it's asked of them then they will write. Some people do it for a laugh. And some people just aren't excited by the prospect of words. Which category do you think you fall into?" Rose scratched her head.

"I was never really great academically…" she began.

"That's not important," interrupted Charles. "Did you want to express yourself? Did you have a good imagination? Just because we're in Heaven doesn't mean you get given these things for free, you know. God wants you to use this time to delve into yourself and find your talents – the ones you already had." Rose thought about this. She'd written a bit of stuff in school, but had never thought of doing it as a career or anything. She'd always sort of assumed she'd work at Henrik's for the rest of her life. But after travelling with the Doctor, she'd learnt that anything was possible. And, she had to admit, she _had _been feeling really inspired to write since joining her book club.

"I've never felt extremely creative before," she admitted, "but now it's all I think about." Charles smiled.

"A late bloomer," he said. "Very well – write. Write whatever you want, whenever you want. Let the story tell itself. And, most importantly, don't write for anyone else except yourself."

"Thank you Mr Dickens, er, Charles," said Rose, turning to leave. "I'll do my best."

"That's all that can be asked of you," said Charles. "And as for those tips on writing – that's just my opinion, don't forget. My friend Agatha has completely opposite views. 'Start from the ending, then work your way backwards', she says. I've tried it but it just doesn't work…" Charles looked up, only to see that Rose had left.

* * *

So Rose wrote. For days on end, she just wrote whatever came to mind. She wrote of her adventures, her feelings, the people she'd met, the things she'd learnt … she didn't want to stop. She'd been writing for what seemed like forever when she realised it was time for her meeting with the Doctor's previous companions (and assistants, and associates). Excitedly she brought what she'd written in the hope of getting some feedback. She arrived, and opened the door.

"Hi guys!" she said happily, not really looking at what was happening. "I'm so excited, I've been writing a sort of autobiography for the last few days … well, I don't know how long exactly…"

"Then you haven't been watching," said Jamie.

"You mean the Doctor?" said Rose. "Yeah, I've seen a few snippets. It's a bit boring though, what with him being human and all. At least it'll get interesting again in a month…" Rose finally looked up. The other companions were gathered round the big screen, watching the Doctor, or at least the man inside his body. And he was kissing Joan Redfern.

"Oh."

- - - - - - - - - - - - - - -

_Okay, so I have this dream that I'll be able to keep posting fanfics after I've died..._

_For those of you who were fans of my fic **Reunited (and it feels so good)**, I've created a trailer for it. It's on YouTube, or you can get the link from my profile._


	13. Chapter 13

_ATTENTION ALL AUSSIES (and people who want to help out Aussies). There is an online poll for a TV Week poster boy, and one of the options is David Tennant! I, and I'm sure many others, would like David to win to we can stick him up on our walls. So please help out by going to www(dot)tvweek(dot)com(dot)au and going to the poster poll. Voting ends in a few days, so get to it!_

After getting over the initial shock of seeing the Doctor kissing a woman, Rose sat down silently and watched what else was happening. She made use of a few brief moments to ask what she'd missed. But when her friends showed her the picture of herself in John Smith's diary, she tried not to show her surprise.

"He remembers me – so what?" she said. "He also remembers the Slitheen, the gas-mask zombies, the Clockwork Droids…"

"But _you're_ the only companion in the diary," said Vicki.

"It's probably because we travelled together fairly recently," surmised Rose. "Maybe he can only remember recent events."

"Then how come he can remember all his previous forms?" asked the Brigadier. Rose chose not to answer this. Instead, she turned her attention back to 1913. Her book lay forgotten.

Despite Heaven's filtering out of sad feelings, each companion certainly felt something as they watched John Smith make his life-ending decision. And though they were glad to see their Doctor back, they couldn't help but wonder what happened to John Smith.

"Do you think he's here?" wondered Katarina. "He did die, after all."

"I don't know," said Barbara. "Didn't the Doctor say that John Smith was still in him somewhere?"

"But for 2 months, John Smith was alive," said Jamie. "He could be here."

"You're all forgetting something," said Rose. The others looked at her. "Joan. She's definitely here. And I think she needs to talk to us."

"Rose, don't be ridiculous," said the Brigadier. "The poor lady doesn't want anything to do with the Doctor."

"Maybe she didn't 90 years ago," reasoned Rose, "but she might now. Anyway, it's worth a try." The other companions exchanged glances.

"I suppose she falls into the category of 'Companions, Assistants and Associates'," said Ian. Rose smiled.

* * *

They all went to see Joan together, thinking that they might be more convincing as a group. The Brigadier took command, and giving the door three firm knocks, he stood ready to face this woman who had charmed her way into John Smith's life.

"You realise she's probably living with her husband," said Barbara. "Don't you think she's happy enough with him?"

"Aye, that's true," agreed Jamie. "And she's never contacted us before. I think if she really needed to talk she would have done so by now."

"Maybe she was scared," suggested Vicki. "The Doctor's life _is_ quite fantastic."

"She's in Heaven!" exclaimed Katarina. "What's more fantastic than that?" Meanwhile, Rose was thinking. Joan was most likely back with her husband. But what if John Smith had stayed behind, and they'd grown old together? When they died, who would she choose? Who did _anyone_ choose when they had everyone they'd ever met in one place? Was there polygamy in Heaven? She'd have to ask Nathaniel later…

Finally, Joan opened the door.

"Can I help you?" she asked.

"It's more a question of whether we can help you," said the Brigadier. "You don't know us, but we're associates of _the Doctor_." Joan closed her eyes.

"I take it you aren't referring to a medical practitioner," she said. They nodded, and Ian stood up.

"You've been here for a while, I take it," he said. "And yet we never heard from you. We just wondered if there was anything you needed to get off your chest. We've all been there, you know. Well, not _quite_ as much there as you have, but…"

"The Doctor came into my life a long time ago," said Joan. "He was only a part of my life for a very short time, and for the majority of that time he was another man entirely. I don't think he made a big enough impact for me to need to talk about him."

"I know where you're coming from," said Katarina. "I only knew the Doctor for a brief period too. I didn't even understand anything about him – I thought he was a god! And I'm one of many who have died because of him. But he changed me so much in that brief period that I want to learn more and more about him."

"I lost my memories of the Doctor," said Jamie, taking over. "And when I finally died and recovered them, I was so sad that I hadna had them in the remainder of my life, because I experienced such amazing things in his presence that would have lit up my life." They looked at Joan longingly, but she turned her head.

"I appreciate your concern," she said, "but really, I'm not interested." From the back of the group, a voice spoke up.

"Please," it said. The people in front parted, to reveal Rose. As soon as Joan saw her she gasped.

"The girl from the journal…" she whispered. "Even after all these years I remember your face. Rose, wasn't it?"

"That's right," said Rose. "And I've had one of the closest relationships with the Doctor than all these guys put together. If you want to talk about losing the man you love, then I'm the one to talk to." Joan slowly nodded.

"Very well," she said. "I'll talk with you. I'd invite you in, but my husband's entertaining some friends."

"That's okay, we'll take you back with us," said Ian. "You might even want to come on a regular basis."

"We'll see," said Joan. Just then, they all disappeared.

* * *

"'Companions, Assistants and Associates of the Doctor'," read Joan. "Are you sure you didn't leave anything out?" Rose smiled. At least Joan had a sense of humour.

"I'm so glad you agreed to this," she said. "I just want to help you. We all do."

"Yes," said Joan uncertainly. "I don't suppose it would be possible for us to keep this ... between the two of us?" The other companions couldn't help but feel a little offended.

"Oi, we've been through the same things, you know," said Jamie.

"Let her do what she wants, Jamie," said Vicki in understanding. "She obviously doesn't want to be crowded at a time like this." Reluctantly, Jamie and the others left, leaving just Rose and Joan.

"I have to ask," said Rose, "didn't you ever think of tracking down the Doctor or people associated with him once you got here? You've got so much knowledge at your fingertips, and you just ignored it."

"That's not quite true," said Joan. "At first I was just so happy to have my husband back that I didn't feel I needed any closure. He told me he was fine with me falling in love with another man, because he wanted me to be happy. He told me he'd looked for John Smith, but he isn't here." Rose bit her lip.

"Then is he still part of the Doctor?" she asked.

"My husband made some enquiries," continued Joan. "Apparently when John Smith died, he _did_ in fact come here. He was met specially, since his case was so unique. He was told that he could join the rest of us here – or leave." Joan lowered her head. "He chose to leave." Rose gasped.

"Why?" she asked quite forcefully.

"I think he realised that this wasn't the place for him," answered Joan. "He had no family, no friends, no actual memories other than from those 2 months of his life. And while Heaven no doubt would have been a place where he could learn things and enjoy himself, it wouldn't have given him the things that he truly needed. He couldn't even enjoy a proper relationship with God, since he was created separately." Rose let out a long breath.

"Blimey," she said. "Poor guy.

"But I'm getting off track," said Joan. "As for the Doctor – I truly wanted to forget about that part of my life. I wanted to leave it at John dying, and that was the end of it. And whenever I got a bit curious, I got myself so distracted that I didn't have time to think about it. I know it probably wasn't the best option, but even in Heaven you've got to be ready for these sorts of things. I wasn't ready."

"But you're ready now," said Rose.

"I suppose I am," replied Joan. "And I am curious to know about your relationship with the Doctor. He obviously cared very deeply for you." Rose nodded.

"We never acted upon our feelings, but they were there all right," she said. "It was just so complicated that neither of us knew what to do. The guy was a 900 year old alien, for crying out loud!" Joan's eyes widened.

"Are you serious?" she questioned. Rose laughed.

"Of course – you didn't know any of that," she realised. "Oh Joan, you know so little about the Doctor. And there's so much to tell! I suppose ... I could do the transfer of information." From the corner of her eye, she spied her book lying on the floor.

"Actually," she said, "I have a better idea. I know how much you love reading people's journals, and I documented all my adventures with the Doctor. Would you care to browse through them?" She leaned down and picked up the book. Joan looked at it, then the hint of a smile came onto her face.

"It's been a while since I read a good book," she said.

- - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - -

_Right, that's done. Now I'm going to try to stop referring to current Who, since this is meant to be AU and I've got to get through A LOT of time. Already I think bringing Joan in this late was a mistake. Not that it wasn't a good idea, but I've written a lot of chapters and yet it's been a year at most. _


End file.
